When You're Just Not That Mom | Marvelous Mundane

As I watched the snow fall in large flakes, I imagined the fun my one and two year old would have in the hours to come.  I pictured the squeals of delight as we caught snowflakes on our tongue, and the laughter as we built our first snowman of winter. However, cries to be fed and changed snapped me back to reality, and I quickly decided  “I’m not that mom”. I’m not the mom (the seven months pregnant mom!) who is going to take her two toddlers out in the snow for the first time, by herself.  Why would I do that to myself? I’m not that mom.

With that vision squashed, I turned to my kitchen and thought of the yummy treats we could make instead. I thought of gluten free muffins to surprise my husband, and fun cookies to bake for the kids. Again, I quickly looked at my kitchen, imagined the mess that would ensue, and said to myself, “I’m not that mom”.

I am not the mom who is going to stress myself out trying to replicate what my other mom friends are doing with their snow day. My Facebook thread was full of moms baking cookies, playing outside in the snow with their kids, or watching happily from their window. I can’t be that mom; my kids are toddlers who can’t be left outside alone. Baking with them right now is not worth the stress and mess, not to mention the cleaning it creates for me during naptime. And naptime is sacred time in my house, a time I drink coffee, read, and recharge.

I had a choice to make. I could evaluate my success as a mom on a snow day by comparing myself to others’ adventures, or I could own my motherhood by making this snow day the best it could be in my current circumstance of young kids and a growing belly.

I chose to sit by the window with my kids, watching the falling snow in awe.  I chose fascinating kid-friendly shows about snowflakes. I chose a simple lunch with easy clean up. And then an unexpected surprise- my husband came home from work early, and together we took the kids outside. We had a blast! No tears were shed, and we even made a snowman. He was an utterly creepy looking snowman, with leaves for his eyes and his mouth, but it was a sweet memory. Later in the evening we made “break and bake” cookies that had been left over in the fridge from a meeting that month. My two year old, Judah, thought it was the best day ever.

Mom, don’t guilt yourself scrolling through Facebook and Instagram, comparing yourself and your day to others. You are not that mom. You are not that wife. You are you, and you have a specific calling for this day. Make the choice to enjoy your day no matter how different it looks from your friends. Own your day.